Another Witness

One of my favorite ideas to discuss with people is how God shows up unexpectedly in their lives. Whether its new thought while being still, the words of a child, the testimony of a part of nature that tells us something about the Creator, or a shift in perspective in response to experience, I hunger for these conversations. In his book 'A Grief Observed', C.S. Lewis wrote that "My idea of God is not a divine idea. It has to be shattered time after time. He shatters it himself. He is the great iconoclast. Could we not almost say that this shattering is one of the marks of his presence? The Incarnation is the supreme example; it leaves all previous ideas of the Messiah in ruins." An iconoclast is someone who attacks settled beliefs, and while initially I found the idea of Christ as iconoclastic distasteful, I now see it as rather fitting. I think of the response of people when Christ was on the earth as He taught with power and authority. Some were converted, some were resistant, some wanted to silence him, but I believe ALL were astonished. All were surprised. Christ and His teachings were not what anyone expected, despite years of prophecy. He changed perspectives with the depth of His love, the breadth of His vision, and the precision of His miracles. 

While I have had some shattering experiences that have led me to a greater understanding of God's character, this week was more of an unexpected and gentle nudge, a discovery that came quietly and powerfully all at once. I settled into thinking as the sacrament was blessed and passed with the repetition in the prayers persistently pulling my attention. What we witness--or profess or see taking place--is that we do always remember God's Only Begotten Son. I recognized today that what God wants the most from me is to remember Him, to cultivate a relationship with Him, to keep Him in my soul always. This thought made a difference for me today and it refueled my stores of faith that a difficult week had all but depleted. 

I am grateful that a testimony is continually created and recreated. It is reshaped, reformed, refined as we take time to tend to it. Sometimes that reshaping is a gradual and gentle nudge. Sometimes it is a shattering. Sometimes it is somewhere in between, but any and all ways it comes, a testimony from the Holy Ghost to our spirits is true and can be trusted. And if there is a delay in understanding or the coming of a blessing, I trust and I hope and I believe that it will be worth the wait. I love what Adam S. Miller says about learning who God is. He wrote "When God knocks, don't creep to the door and look through the peephole to see if he looks like you thought he would. Rush to the door and throw it open." I hope that I prepare room in my heart for the unimaginable glory of Christ so that I can welcome Him immediately with joy.